LAST night I reached the perfect communications storm - there was absolutely no way anyone could get in touch with me nor did I have the ability to get in touch with anyone. Is this an inconvenience? Possibly yes, possibly no - I have no idea if anyone has been trying to reach me.

For years I've kidded about the fact that my next phone was going to be a dumb phone. That's not likely to happen because, if nothing else, internet capability enables me to read the magazines and newspapers I'd really have little opportunity, otherwise, to read.

But the chip for my 4G, multi-jurisdiction cellphone was knocked loose and I've been phone less for the past week, not having the opportunity to get this repaired until late tomorrow afternoon in Hong Kong. Now this doesn't really cause me any problem as I get so few calls to begin with (and make fewer, in return!) but with 'No Service' goes no 4G and hence, no back-up internet access.

Therein lies the problem - the internet went down throughout the entire Tianhe district of Guangzhou (where we live) mid-morning yesterday and a day later it is not yet back on. Late yesterday afternoon, Katherine (my wife), whose phone and internet works (different system) was out and I was unreachable short of someone coming and knocking on my door….. and since I'm so hard of hearing, I'd probably not hear them knocking to begin with!

It would obviously be nice to say that I could efficiently use the time to print out already completed tax work in need of printing and assembling but that wireless printer, three rooms over, is 'worthless' when the internet is down and the desktop computer is too damned big to schlep into the printer room.

While I do not think that 2-3 days without email will not be disastrous, I won't know until we get to our apartment in Hong Kong. If the internet is down there, too…… then we've really got a problem.

And so I use this rather long-winded essay introduction to start off the final tax essay of my career. Here it is, the 4th of June and other than re-scheduling yesterday afternoon and virtually all of today into my Hong Kong days, next week, I've little to do other than read and write. My first essay/article, about purchasing and using a mini-computer in my smaller-sized accounting practice appeared in the June 1979 issue of the Journal of Accountancy published by the American Institute of Certified Public Accountants. This, my final article, articulates the helplessness of a computer luddite in not being able to do anything today because virtually all tax work is tied into communications of which I ain't got none at present - fitting, isn't it?

Hey, wasn't that a great introduction? The only problem is that it is now exactly three weeks later and I haven't done a thing - have not written, have not researched, have not truly thought about it. Now, with less than a week left as deadline for submission of my final article, it is time to think of what I am going to write. China…….Hong Kong…..the U.S.

First let's start with the People's Republic of China where the hoopla regarding the recent national unification of a VAT replacing the business tax was, to me at least, far more promotional horn blowing than substance in tax. Changes MUST take place but in other areas as China adapts to the realities of meeting its fiscal needs through development of a transparent system where while corruption will not disappear, it will at least look like progress is being made in a sizable reduction of corruption. Where will tax changes be made in the future? In both treatment of individual income taxes and development of a true property tax with the realization that it is going to take time to implement both if the tax system is to become effective.

The individual income tax returns one files annually in the PRC will have to change. There is still, in essence, a one page individual income tax return with at least 50 boxes on the form. If you have the guts to fill out anything more than the bare minimum you are probably asking for an audit. As a result, I wonder how valid all the tax returns that are filed truly are? My guess is that the higher income earners are substantially understating and that the State Administration of Taxation is likely aware of the extent of understatement but will do nothing in this area until there is a bit more transparency and confidence regarding where and how tax collections are being spent.

Ten years is not a long period of time when you are talking about a country with 23-24 percent of the world's population and an economy that will transition from export driven to domestic consumption driven as the Chinese middle class expands. But in that 10 year period of time I expect that there is going to be a massive overhaul of the forms that are going to have to be filed by income earners in China as the financial needs of the country dictate that the tax system be changed. And along with that will also likely come an audit system for individuals far more reaching than it is at present. I wish to apologize to my Chinese friends because the system I believe will be developed will be closer to that of the IRS in the States than that of Hong Kong's Inland Revenue Department…..such is life…..

The area I'd love to 'observe' over the next half-century (because that's how long I believe it will take to truly develop) is a Chinese property tax system. Other than selling land leases, what have the local jurisdictions been able to do at raising a steady stream of revenues to meet the needs of funding government at the local level? What happens when the land runs out (as it already has in many areas)? Where can you raise the necessary RMB to finance localities?

There is no answer other than a property tax with distinctively Chinese features; one that will 'compensate' for remaining lives of land leases if the system of permanent government ownership of the underlying land is not going to change. The problem begins with jump starting the system by creation of a national land registry in order to maintain a necessary minimum of agricultural land as well as 'control' the degree to which individuals are allowed to buy multiple parcels in multiple jurisdictions, a clear violation of current law.

There've got to be a lot of small time violators of this law throughout the country because it's already more than a few years since the national registry was incepted and it is nowhere close to being completed because of what appears to be a whole lot of foot dragging by local bureaucrats who are not particularly interested in showing the degree to which they might have violated the law with multiple holdings. Can any of this be proved? I doubt it but why else has there been so much foot dragging? A market value property tax will eventually come along with the governmental expansion into the appraisal business (and the watchdogs to hopefully make sure that any hanky panky be kept to a bare minimum). If I'm here a half-century from now I'll write about it all!

O.K. Let's talk about Hong Kong. I'm a permanent resident of Hong Kong and because there is no such thing as a retirement visa for non-Chinese wishing to live in the PRC (even though I have been resident there for a quarter of a century), I reside in the PRC as a Hong Kong permanent resident (one country/two systems is my residency salvation!) but for the past 22 years have also maintained a 275 square foot apartment in Hong Kong. We are permanent residents of Hong Kong but we truly reside in Guangzhou where we have some space! True quality of life in Hong Kong is beyond my economic capability. Thus, I HATE THE HONG KONG COST OF LIVING while simultaneously, I LOVE THE IRD AND THE HONG KONG TAX SYSTEM!!!!! It is simple. You can understand their instructions. If you make a mistake they (those pleasant to deal with employees at the Inland Revenue Department) will politely contact you had help you correct it. How pleasant indeed it is to interface with a tax system like this!!!!!

And yet, IRD and the Hong Kong government totally screwed up when it came to signing a tax agreement with the IRS. While the preponderance of other worldwide jurisdictions (including 'arch-rival' Singapore) signed Type 1 agreements with the IRS where jurisdictional banks are responsible for submitting data to their central governments who will then deal with the IRS, the Type 2 agreement that Hong Kong signed makes it each Hong Kong bank's responsibility to submit/deal directly with the IRS. As a result, by and large, not only are no new US account holders being allowed but many long time clients of several Hong Kong banks are being given their 'pink slips'. And it is not just the smaller banks who have absolutely no idea what they should be doing as a very 'off the record' comment by a person in a sufficiently high position at one of the major Hong Kong banks asked rather matter-of-factly why the investigative press (especially the South China Morning Post) never questioned a Type 2 agreement but he knew two things for sure: firstly that at the highest levels at one of the most prestigious of Hong Kong's banks, they've given up trying to decipher form W-8BEN-E and some of those other, less 'difficult' forms. Due diligence insofar as record maintenance of these forms? Not really - they can't be understood at the big banks and the smaller institutions have stopped trying, opting instead to get rid of U.S. clients. So while Hong Kong's Inland Revenue Department hasn't really done much vis a vis new tax legislation, they certainly have imposed a burden on not just U.S. citizens but all non-Hong Kong individuals and entities - it's bad tax policy any way you look at it….. especially since it is still not that difficult to open up accounts in either Thailand or Singapore!

And that, my friends, leaves me with comments regarding the U.S. tax system as my closing remarks of this my final tax and accounting article after 37 years of writing this sort of stuff.

Executive summary of my feelings about the Internal Revenue Service and the U.S. tax system are dual: The only thing simple about the system is how simply ludicrous it is. A tax system, to be effective, must be easily understood and easy to comply with. The U.S. tax system is the antithesis of ease and comprehension: when a 'sample' return is given to 10 practitioners and there are 8 different results, something is seriously wrong. We should all be appalled at this.

And the duality of my feelings lies not in the immorality of a system sinking under its own weight of ever-expanding rules, regulations, procedures and laws but in the fact that here I am, either 73 or 74 years old (depending upon which continent you are counting from) and in bigger demand than ever to provide assistance to an ever more bewildered group of Americans living outside of their country who don't know their international reporting obligations because the U.S. government is unamazingly ineffective in trying to inform 'tax obligees' who are being stigmatized because they are American. Yeah, its wrong and I don't see it as getting any better in the near future……but who am I to complain if the IRS wishes to fund my retirement plan because of all this idiocy?

And what do I think of FATCA? Well, without FATCA we would never have gotten the OECD's Common Reporting Standards and that, my friends, is what we are going to have in the future. FATCA is a failure - it has nowhere near the amount of GINNs worldwide to make it effective. FATCA is going to have to modify in order to go along with 19 of its other G20 members.

Well that's about it for me insofar as professional bean counting genre writing is concerned. I'm still going to write - only it won't be about taxes or accounting! I'll still work but will aim towards further 'work reduction' because there are so many other things I'd like to do now that the mortgage has been paid and the last kid financed through university. I've literally and figuratively worked my ass off over the past 25 years living in Asia. I started over again at age 48 and along the way discovered that the more cynical I became, the more fun my profession became - while still being a person for whom ethics means 'everything'!!!

Here's to cynicism in our profession! May you guys find another international cynic to fill this monthly section as I have so enjoyably done from inception!